2002

Remember the old joke about the guy who goes to a doctor and asks for credentials? The doctor says, "I've been practicing medicine for 20 years." The guy heads for the door, saying, "I'd rather find a doctor who's through with practice and knows what he's doing." With some new clients, I feel like that doctor when I tell them we have to test a spot. They often say, in effect, "You've been doing this how many years? Don't you know what works yet?"

For the umpteenth time, recently, one of our new clients told us, "Whatever you do with my infomercial, make it funny. Funny sells!"

My first order of the day, as it is for so many of us, is to check my E-mail. And here they come ... more than 50 new messages every morning. Only a few are from people who know me. The rest are from porn sites that offer all kinds of virtual ecstasy, mortgage brokers that promise impossibly low interest rates, and companies selling bulk E-mailing services or software that won't get my company in trouble with my Internet Service Provider (ISP).

F. Scott Fitzgerald's most famous line in The Great Gatsby may be "The rich are different from you and me." Earnest Hemingway supposedly responded, "Yes, they have more money." Fitzgerald's contention and Hemingway's response have significance for direct marketers.